Friday, March 13, 2009

Few Things

Here's a few things I've been thinking about. First, when I ask you to let me know you're out there, I don't really want a roll call. I appreciate it, but what I'd really like to hear is your response to Swimming 101 or First Time Sex. Those are places where I reveal a lot about myself and hopefully touch a few nerves and so that's where I want the responses. This last week I wrote about abandoning Sierra and have one response...man, I have been dealing with that all week in the deep parts of my soul....nobody else but one thought it worth commenting on or related to that? I find that hard to believe but maybe it's true, given the single response to something that meant/means so much to me.
This week, tonight, Chepa's boyfriend and the father of Sierra and Alexa comes into town for a few days for her birthday and tonight she came over for dinner to let me see the girls before I'm cut off for a couple/several days. We ate a great meal, played, laughed, smoked a couple of cigarettes to make their little lungs stretch and get strong, and then they were gone. I'm sad but satiated. I love those girls. And why shouldn't I? I'm not their dad but they are my kids' sisters and they came from my wife's belly and I once pulled Madeleina from there so I know the space and probably a lot of people would think it strange but I still love them as if they were mine but know they're not.
I've a lot more to say but will keep it short tonight. What I'm trying to get at is please respond to the posts, not just to my silly pleas to let me know who is here...I already know I expose a lot of my soul here...what I would like to know is whether anybody cares about that. Does it help anybody? Does it match what you're going through? Or parallel it? That's what I'm really after.
And tomorrow I will have another post along these lines, if I remember it, that would be too complicated for this moment. This moment is for saluting you and hoping that Chepa and Sierra and Alexa and my Madeleina make it to the airport without a hitch and that the plane carrying T, the father of Sierra and Alexa makes it okay. It's a low ceiling so I'm nervous.
But the kids need their dad so I'm crossing my fingers it'll be a fine fine landing.

5 comments:

The Grudge said...

Your words are entertaining and uplifting. I humbly appreciate your honesty and ability to share. I don't always comment because I feel I don't have much to add. I look forward to your blog updates. Take care Pete!

23 said...

Mr P Gorman, of course we love you! You pull back the curtains and let everyone in. We feel right at home. But, sometimes we forget to give back because we are spoiled by you doing all the work!

I'm glad you can ask for what you need.

Thanks for sharing, sir.

...... said...

It's very difficult to respond or comment when you're talking about yourself and your feelings...as you said, it is a part of your soul, who am I to told you something about that ? And if I do, what can I say to calm your soul ?
In these "experiences" of life, you're talking about yourself with true, with an open heart and this is why i love to come on your blog, you are a sincere person.
I can't told you to do or not do something, or thinking like that...when you write about you, specialy about the post about Sierra, it remember a story I lived, I was, I think, in the same mood than you...it takes me time but today I'm ok, the answer was in me and it take me some times to realize that I had to show on my children that I am also a person like them, that sometimes I can't do some things, that I can't fix all the problems, thought that when you have a heart, and when you are sincere with yourself, life is beautiful no ?
Hope that you will continue to blog, the sharing is beautiful with real person.
Thank you.

Gritter said...

Peter, the very best thing about your blogs is that they relate.

They relate to each of us that read them. They make us think of things in our lives that parallell your expressed thoughts. And, when that happens, we (I know I do anyway) have to sit back and think on the things your blog has brought to our(my) mind.

I suspect we then get a bit lost in the reverie and by the time we have sorted out all the feelings you have caused us to feel, we just don't think to write a response. A response at that point seems in some way a small thing compared to what you have just given us.

Those are my thoughts about it anyway.

I did indeed "think" to reply to each of those blogs but, as I thought about what you had said and experienced the depth of the emotion you conveyed, I got lost in the far reaches of my memory - thanks to you - a reverie that was as gratifying as it was difficult.

So, thank you Peter Gorman! Please don't stop. I look every day for new inspiration.

peg said...

First.. thank you for sharing your life with us all. Your words do take me back to various times in my life, or situations that took place.
Laughed my ass off at your first time sex story - how about those cats uh?! tricky little devils -ha
Absolutely felt the pain in your/my heart at a little one running yelling "wait for me..wait for me" ~ouch~
Keep writing and sharing your life man... you rock!