Thursday, September 08, 2016

Feeling good again

I don't know why I was so crazy the other day, why I didn't fit into my own skin, couldn't breathe deeply, couldn't get relief from almost anything, but it seems to have passed. I'm feeling very strong today, feeling good. Just went to the store and forgot to buy hummingbird food so I just made some here--it's just sugar water, so not a problem, but I realized I was snubbing the hummingbirds by being so distracted by myself. Now they'll eat good again.
   I think human interaction and being needed is important to me. Whether it's needed as a dad or a writer or a jungle guide or friend, I get grounded by feeling useful, feeling that there is a spot for me. And I think sometimes I don't feel needed at all. If Madeleina's at school, my stories for the magazines are all caught up, no friends drop by--remember, we usually have a busy house with house guests, but have not had many the last couple of weeks--if Italo doesn't come by and Chepa doesn't stop by for coffee...well, I can go 36 hours without human contact beyond a store teller. And I think that's part of what had me so edgy, and I do mean edgy.
   Anyway, I'm okay now and hope it will last. Thank you all for putting up with my rant of a couple of days ago.

1 comment:

Jazze said...

Totally understand where you are coming from with those feelings.....